[This reflects only the last leg of “the journey of a lifetime” for one Sinaite. We are now in year 2018. This is part of our “looking back” series, remembering where we came from and how far we have travelled the pathway to the Sinai Revelation. This was an email exchange between a messianic teacher and his bible student of 3 decades; circa September 2010; slightly edited for publication when it was first posted in 2012. We share these exchanges because they represent two belief systems that run counter to each other, and being exposed to two or more sides of any issue adds to decision-making for those who face ‘ crossroads’ in their journey of faith. —Admin 1]
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Sinaite: Confession time.
I’ve come to yet another crossroad in my Truth-seeking and am taking a direction I never thought I would ever take. This redirection started sometime this year when you conducted the one-day seminar at Noah’s Ark. You mentioned that a former Christian who turned Messianic (Singapore pastor, I think) went all the way back to Judaism. I thought about that person’s decision and why, if he’s met Jesus of Christianity/Yeshua of Messianic Judaism, would he revert to a “Christ-less” faith?
Well, truth to tell, I’ve come to a similar decision lately—not to go back to Judaism like that believer did, but to simply stick with YHWH the God of Israel, as we’ve come to know Him through TNK.
You see, after getting my Christian beliefs straightened out by Hebrew Roots/Messianic teaching, I started investigating all other “givens” in christianity that I never questioned before.
This came about because I felt I was being “led,” because circumstances were just taking me to sources I wasn’t even seeking.
Just lately, I finally caught up with reading a whole shelf of books I collected from various sources—some bought in Santa Rosa [not from Christian or Messianic sources, but the “religious” section of bookstores like Barnes and Noble, Borders, websites like amazon.com]. They’ve been on my bookshelves all this time, I’ve forgotten about them. I didn’t get around to reading them because I spent 2007-2010 catching up with Messianic literature.
I also forgot I had unread books I picked up from your messianic seminar book sales. I reviewed Lew White’s Torah Zone and Fossilized Customs (you gave me this decades ago), though this updated version has expanded in length as well. The web has become a great way to interface with other Truth-seekers sharing their search, so I started reading their discussions.
I even reread several books on the so-called “cults” because I’m in friendly discussion with a Jehovah Witness, a Unitarian, and a Mormon. I watch 7th Day Adv. channel a lot because of their health programs but also check out their teaching. I’ve always wondered why these christian groups are designated as “cults” [therefore, stay clear of them] and figured out that basically, it’s because they’ve deviated from some basic doctrine[s] of mainstream christianity —like the Trinity, Incarnation, immortality of the soul, concept of hell as eternal punishment, they worship on the biblical Sabbath, or follow the teachings of their founder, etc. Yet, all of them do have kernels of biblical truth.
Add to all the above:
* Your book that I borrowed from the BCMC library , Christian Anti-Semitism: A History of Hate [quite an eye-opener, that’s why I asked you to bring me home a copy];
*several updated and expanded tomes on Christian History [mind-boggling details] ;
*published scholarly debates in the Jesus Seminar which reopened centuries-old questions on gentilized Christianized version of the Jewish messiah;
*studies of textual critics with modern superior tools of textual analysis,
*linguistic studies which are able to detect errors, additions, awkward juxtapositions, etc. that earlier scholars could not do without computer technology; and of course,
*recent archeological discoveries.
I reread books I had since 1990s on how the NT canon was put together; textual critics’ examination of the gospels—what Yeshua said and claimed for himself, what his followers claimed for him, what others added in transmission, plus recently published books like Scripting Jesus, Misquoting Jesus, The Gospel of Jesus Christ [as opposed to the Gospel according to Matthew, Mark, Luke, John].
And since my training is in literature, I reviewed books on hermeneutics [I’ve bought all there is available on that subject]
At a local bookstore, I also stumbled upon The Power New Testament, a recent NT version where questionable texts included in all Bible versions/translations and indicated by notations/italics/parentheses-
I had to wonder WHO was leading me to all these discoveries, the God of Truth or the father of lies? I mean, books would practically jump on my lap, fall out of my shelves, when I as much as think of a specific topic! I figured maybe YHWH thought I’m ready for this, I’m ripe for the picking. Test me!
So much tampering with the NT part of our bible stunned me. I know God’s truth is in the New Testament scriptures, buried like the TNK was in man-made traditions and additions. But at least even if TNK got buried with rabbinic commentaries and oral tradition, the additions were still based on God’s earlier foundational revelation. As far as the NT is concerned, I no longer am sure what to swallow and what to spit out. I used to love the Gospel of John, I thought it was such a perfect literary creation only to find out it probably is! Now I regard it as simply a perfectly crafted piece of literature; whoever penned it was a great writer with an intention obvious to me only now, never before.
There’s more to this than I can explain on email. If I’m treading on dangerous ground, straighten me out.
I’ve scribbled my favorite prayer on all the bibles I’ve bought and used. I don’t know where I first read it, I just wrote it down and it reminds me that Truth-search is a never ending journey for us on this side of eternity. No one has a monopoly of it; no one knows it all; our glimpse of YHWH is about the extent of the 5 blind men and the elephant, even with the help of modern computer technology.
So, here’s my prayer:
“From the cowardice that shrinks from new truths,
From the laziness that is content with half truths,
From the arrogance that thinks it knows all truth,
O God of Truth . . . deliver us!”
—Anonymous
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Messianic Pastor: Shalom, and I mean the “Peace that surpasses all understanding!”
Amen to your prayer at the end! And Yes, you are being tested, sifted as wheat to see what you really are, probably more testing in this area than I have faced, not having all those books to read to confuse me! I know the NT has not been handled over time as carefully as the TNK. This is a slippery slope, so do not throw any banana peels in your path as you walk along!
I also am aware that some “scholars” like attention, like to be critical in order to stir up controversy and become “authorities.” Like politicians and clergy, there is money, position, and power available to those who can break loose and become different. However, a few are genuine, humble seekers of Truth. We need much discernment to know which is which, what is Truth and what is a slick counterfeit. In these last days, this is extremely so!!
I have a few foundation stones:
1) Spiritual Truth is revealed by God to His insiders, those genuinely in His Family, those who have been given eyes to see, ears to hear, and hearts to trust and obey. This is clear in the TNK, and clearly said in Mt 13:10ff and Mt 16:17. Outsiders can see the same evidence and come to different conclusions. As in salvation, this is all by His Grace, not our abilities. Diligent study of His Word is essential, and will be rewarded.
2) God is Infinitely Holy. Mankind is Infinitely sinful. Mankind can do nothing to bridge this gap, and God made it this way in His Master Plan. To bridge the gap, God provided Himself, in His Son Yeshua, as an Infinitely Holy sacrifice to pay for all of mankind’s sins, which He offers to all mankind. To those who respond positively, again by His Grace and possibly His Choice, He makes them His children, His Family. There is no other way for love to prevail, both agapao and phileo, for God is Love! Sifting is essential to make the separation. Mankind is unique. Angels do not have this choice.
3) As for the TNK and NT, I believe every word was controlled by God as the writers wrote the texts. Since we have only copies today, and versions in English for us, if I have any Trust in God at all, I deliberately Trust Him without question that He will guide my study of His Word to come to Truth and be given discernment to wade through any manipulations of the text by the enemy. This is why I think Greek is essential to compare manuscripts and leave questionable passages to “later.” I do not have to know everything; I do not need to have an answer for everything. I do need to know God and to walk in step with Him. By God, I mean the “three in one,” but do not like the word Trinity=3 gods. To me, Yeshua is fully Deity and fully humanity as Adam before he sinned. Anything less means that His sacrifice was not acceptable.
Understanding all this is overwhelming to the point of shedding tears of JOY and gratefulness that I can live day by day with that “peace that surpasses all understanding.” No sweat, no stress, no fear.
When we get to Baguio in December, we can have a one-on-one study. I will listen, you talk, ok?
With much love and appreciation, my sister!!
Messianic Pastor: Hag Sameach is the greeting for any Hag – one of the 3 pilgrim festivals in Jerusalem – and this one is Sukkot.
Today being the last great day of the Appointed Time of Sukkot, we meet as it is a Holy Convocation, at least those who do not have to go to work. The group here is about 15 people. I did not start it…they invited us in to help teach. They want to study Revelation, so I am re-doing that one for them, and myself. I am fully convinced that we are about at the End of the End Times and THE Kingdom is coming, the one promised to Israel, to David and his greater Son, THE Messiah, and with details in all the Prophets. THE Messiah can be none other than YHVH Yeshua Meshiach.
You are much in prayer these days, as “Satan has desired you, to sift you as wheat,” but YHVH is going to bring you through to victory, not only for your sake, but for all those who depend on you. The responsibility of being a teacher is frightening and heavy, but we (in contrast to others) must teach only Truth as far as we know it.
Blessings on you with much love and prayer.
Sinaite: Yes, I take very seriously my responsibility as a “teacher” since YHWH will hold us responsible for handling or mishandling His revelation.
A friend keeps correcting me that I should not even think that I’m “teaching” but that I’m only “sharing” what I learn . . .[whatever] . . . each individual makes his decision for himself. As a “sharer” my objective as it has been from the beginning, is to equip any willing learner with the same training I studied and specialized in college/grad school . . . how to read a book, any book . . . and specially how to read the Bible. I do show how different religions reach doctrinal positions; mistranslations; point of view, etc. In the process I share what I’ve come to believe, for myself. That is all I do. It’s a take it or leave it understanding between me and the others.
Until I’ve done further homework on what I shared with you last email, I stay on what I feel is solid ground for now—- YHWH of the Hebrew Scriptures. Him I fully understand. Yeshua of the gospels and the New Testament, I have to restudy.
Messianic Pastor: Blessings on you! I also share what I have learned, “take it or leave it.” But you and I never quit learning!!
Right now I am re-teaching-sharing the book of Revelation as requested by the small group here, after many years only looking at certain parts…but I need to know it, along with all the TNK Prophets, as the Time is NOW.
Daniel spelled it out quite well….. You are better at handling literature, much more so that I am.
This might be helpful….. hope it comes through, although they want you to subscribe to their Newsletter to get the book free……..
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Sinaite: Thanks, will check it out, although I think I’ve read everything there is to both sides of the argument but it’s always good to read all there is available. It’s really not confusing to me. I used to think I wasted my time in college and gradschool majoring in literature; now I see how that training is finally put to good use; I know God prepared me for this time.
Like I said, I have no problem with TNK; no matter what “new finds” say about it; I see God’s signature there. It’s NT I have to review with different vision-glasses, minus everything I swallowed without question before.
I know God’s Truth is there, just need to seek God’s leading and confirmation of what’s His and what’s man-made.
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